EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW IN COMPOSING YOUR OWN WEDDING VOW
Lhia Ubaldo | April 25, 2020
You have written maybe hundreds of love letters to your beloved, yet why do you find it hard to compose a wedding vow?
WHY DO WE SAY VOWS AT WEDDINGS?
Wedding vows are the words you recite to your partner in front of your witnesses that explain exactly how you and your partner promise to treat each other in marriage. It’s very personal, intimate and they’re the special words that will unite, represent your commitment to one another and will echo in each other’s hearts for a lifetime. It is your whole heart into paragraphs and words.
So take your time finding the right wording for your ceremony—or even write your own. Here are some tips to help you get started.
RESEARCH LOTS OF EXAMPLE FOR INSPIRATION
Start by simply watching some romantic movies and TV shows (you can make the word ‘romantic movies and TV shows’ clickable and re-direct them to that blog ☺), read a book from your favourite novel or search the internet for wedding vow samples. Once you’ve found a few that you like, save them and re-read them over and over and ask yourself what it is about the style that drew you to those words in particular.
JOT DOWN NOTES ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP–REFLECT
Take some time to reflect all the good times you’ve had with your partner. Or your whole relationship journey, good or bad, it was still an experience for both of you as you’ve learned and you’ve become stronger because of it. Go back to the feeling you’ve felt when you first met, what made you fall in love and when did you two decided to spend the rest of your lives together; the little things that your partner does that just makes your heart skip a beat. Write it all out.
INSERT A LIST OF PROMISES
A vow is all about promises after all. Now that you’ve started to jot down some of the things that feels good about your relationship, its now time to think of your promises to your partner. What do you promise to do, to not do, and say to them after this ceremony that would last a lifetime?
LET SOMEONE CHECK YOUR WEDDING VOW
Now it’s coming together, and you’re now more confident with your draft, or perhaps you’ve finished and made a clean copy for yourself already. But we suggest asking someone you trust–ideally someone who is good in literature and words to check your vow is a must. As they can correct you and critique you with your grammar, delivery, mood and duration. Maybe you’ve missed something or maybe you put in too much detail… You never know.
PRACTICE AND READ IT OVER AND OVER
Just like your school days, when your teacher said you have to recite and do a report tomorrow in class, you practice at home so your classmates wouldn’t make fun of you. So should you on your wedding day. Although it’s a much more relaxed event since its just your friends and families, practicing how to say so it wouldn’t feel like your doing a tongue-twister would help. By the time you’re now in front of your partner at the altar, you have probably memorized it and you wouldn’t bother looking at your copy anymore.
STILL HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO START? HERE ARE SOME FEW EXAMPLES:
- When times get tough in our marriage, I promise to persevere and stand by you, to be patient, understanding and courageous.
- When I speak to you, or about you, I promise to be respectful and kind.
- I promise to consider your needs, even if it involves sacrifice on my part, which I aim to make without reluctance or resentment.
- I promise to be faithful to you, and if I have doubts or insecurities, I promise to be courageous and share them with you.
- I promise to respect your opinions and feelings even if we have different points of view.